journal online is silly and putting myself out there but I would rather be remembered then have it be as though I never was in a few generations.
Lately I've realized how much the Lord has blessed me. I have great things that happened in my life. Two semesters ago I was a mentor for an asperger's group and the next semester I became director. In that role I did a ton of research. I found Drexel's program and how to train and start a mentoring program was laid out. Dr. Horowitz gave me permission to use the material and I built up the program with the help of Wynn Hill who introduced me to the directors of the Health Center. Our program found a home in the Health Center and now Angela Kerr is helping to create structure. Hopefully a website, online applications, and confidentiality forms will be the result. People have contacted me and requested mentors.
Because of this program my teacher Richard Whiting encouraged me to teach a class to replace my Populations at Risk class and within a month of his suggestion I was teaching a class on autism. Brother Whiting also gave me a job as a TA which has been such an incredible blessing. The hours are flexible and exactly enough money to pay tithing and cover the cost of gas to go back and forth to Idaho Falls for my internship at the hospital. And enough to add in a few extra summer fun excursions and activities.
This summer I have been white water rafting for $35 for everything including transportation, equipment, and lunch....
To a Diamond Rio concert...(for $8 at BYU-Idaho's Center Stage)...'
Went to a Relief Society Retreat in Island Park area at bishop's cabin....near amazing scenery....
Went to a Bill Cosby show for $15 courtesy of BYU-Idaho's Center Stage...
And can I say tonight Mr. Cosby made me laugh harder than I ever have in my life. I am so grateful for this night and I got to go with Phillip who I feel like needed this too. I'm so glad that I have great friends in my life and to have the opportunity to go to awesome events like this. I wish I could have recorded it. I think this made my whole month and its only just begun.
Can I just add a note about Phillip and yes I know I'm putting this out into the crazy world of public domain but I feel like saying it and well... I do what I want.
So I was afraid that telling him I liked him would make things weird but I've been surprised that I feel more like myself now than ever. Since we've decided to be friends I don't have to feel like I'm trying to prove something, like trying to convince him why he should be with me. I'm really glad to be friends because like I said before its better then being confused.
Sitting in Bill's show tonight I realized that I love to laugh and I don't do it enough. I have such great things in my life and whining about the one thing that hasn't happened yet does me no good.
I am happy with where my life is going and though I'm not exactly sure where that is yet I know its going to be fantastic. I feel like going home is a good thing. Getting my Master's and not exactly having a plan after that. I'm okay with it. And talking to Phillip tonight I've decided something...if I don't have a set job after I graduate grad school then I'm going to be spontaneous. Go some where and do something that I've always wanted. See the world outside of the classroom and my predictable planned out life. If Chelsea is still in Hungary then I will stay and see Europe with her but if not maybe I can find some program to be a part of and go to some foreign country and use my skills as a social worker and clinical counselor (going for my LCSW) to become a part of the culture and people...to build them up and be built up by them. To not fit into the mold and limitations that I've created in my own mind.
I have been so blessed and one day someone will see me for who I am and want to seek for my happiness but for now I have to find it on my own!
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